Hello Reader,

Have you felt torn between being a good guest and taking care of yourself?

That was me on last week...

My sister and her husband visited us for four days.

I love them deeply. But every visit reminds me how easily joy and overwhelm can coexist.

Having guest always brings up my 3 classic dilemmas and maybe you’ll recognize some of them too.

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1) Too much closeness

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As an expat, I crave togetherness: long conversations, laughter and belonging.

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But then it starts to spill over. I absorb everyone’s moods without realizing it. Their stress becomes mine. Their worries settle in my body.

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Suddenly, I need quiet but I am afraid to seem distant or rude.

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2) Too much fun

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Guests are my invitation to break the routine: go out, explore, try new places.

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But I am a creature of rhythm and rest. Crowded restaurants and busy roads drain me faster than expected.

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By day 3, I am tired, irritable and ironically stop enjoying the very moments I was excited for.

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3) Food landmines

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This is when it gets tricky.

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When I put my guests needs ahead of mine, waiting to eat together, adjusting meal times, or going along with the flow, I often pay the price.

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By the time we sit down to eat, I’m hangry, less mindful and more likely to overeat.

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Waiting for others to eat together sounds polite, but for me, it’s not a winning formula. I can occasionally do it but I’ve learnt to minimize it.

The joy of feeling understood

Over the years, I have learnt that protecting my boundaries is not selfish. It’s how I stay sane, kind and connected.

My non negotiable are simple:

• Quiet alone time every day
• Enough sleep to feel sane
• Restaurants that respect my food needs

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Thankfully my sister gets it. She does not see my boundaries as rejection. And that to me, is love.

This week’s reflection

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If you’ve ever found yourself overeating during family visits, pause before judging yourself.

You’re not alone.

These moments aren’t a test of willpower, they’re opportunities to practice balance and self-compassion.

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💬 So tell me, what small boundary can you honor this week even it feels uncomfortable to stay connected to you?

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With care,

Rouba

P.S: The more you practice honoring your needs in company, the less food has to carry the emotional load.
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Hi I am Rouba, I blend food addiction counseling with breathwork to help you heal the root cause of your food and body struggles so that you sustain weight loss. Visit my website here to learn more about me and how we can work together. Follow me on Instagram and Linkedin